In These Last Moments
by daisuke-hieiXXX
Summary: LilyandJames try to deal with life as happily as possible,knowing their days are numbered.Suspicions arise as friends become possible enemies and spies. their thots the last few months.
1. Living

James breathed in the morning air and sighed happily. He could hear Lily singing to Harry as he cried from being woken up. He looked out at the garden, which Lily had cared for so lovingly throughout her pregnancy. She hadn't been able to give it much attention though since Harry required her almost all day. The roses were growing unchecked over the fence, the lilies were almost choked by weeds, and the grass was slowly encroaching on the small garden.

He smiled and went out to the garden shed. He found Lily's tools she used and knelt by the garden. He did his best to fix it up and it was beautiful he had to admit when it was done.

The sun was nearly all the way up now and Lily was making lunch. He ran in eager to devour whatever she had made.

"What is it?" he asked looking cautiously at the food. It didn't smell like anything he had ever had.

"Grilled Cheese Sandwiches," Lily laughed. "Didn't you ever have them?"

"No."

"Well try them. They're good!"

James frowned and took a bite. It wasn't half bad. In fact, it was delicious! He ate the whole thing and began stealing the small pieces from Harry's tray. It wasn't like the kid was going to eat them anyway. He barely had teeth for Pete's sake.

"Oh, Harry! What a good boy you ate all your lunch today!" Lily smiled kissing Harry on the cheek. Harry didn't know why his mother was so happy, but it made him happy too so he laughed.

"Hey, Let's take a walk outside," James suggested, eager to show Lily what he did for her.

"That sounds nice. Lemme get Harry's hat and I'll be right out."

"Fine."

They all walked outside a moment later and James led them over the garden. Lily awed over it and hugged her husband.

"James, it's beautiful!" she beamed squeezing his hand. "Thank you so much!"

"I figured you'd like it."

"I do! Thank you. Thank you Thank you!"

They kissed and Lily put Harry down and let him waddle around the yard. The two began talking and each thought the other was watching Harry. Suddenly they heard the baby scream and the parents raced to the sound, a thousand thoughts running in their minds, chiefly Voldemort.

"Harry!" they both yelled.

Sirius was running up the hill with Harry on his shoulders. Harry was screaming, not from fear, but from pleasure.

"Sirius Black! If you drop my baby I'll hex you!" Lily shouted.

"Hey guys. Ouch! Cut that out!" Sirius swatted Harry's tiny fists away from his mass of handsome black hair.

"What's up, Padfoot?" James asked his best friend.

"Just stopping by," Sirius grinned. "Actually, we need to talk."

Lily and James both swallowed as the color drained from their faces. It was a natural reaction nowadays for the dreaded four words, 'we need to talk'. They had even greater cause to be afraid of those words. Their eyes involuntarily wandered to their small son, perched atop his godfather.

"What's happened?" James asked quickly. "Has the spy been found?"

"Shut up! We'll talk inside!" snapped Sirius looking around for any eavesdroppers.

Lily held Harry as he sucked on his bottle. The two men sat on the couch. The atmosphere was heavy with fear and tension.

"He—he killed the Prewetts last week," Sirius said sadly. "And Dumbledore says he is coming closer to finding you three."

"Should we move?" Lily asked.

"That's a good idea," agreed James. "We'll move over to Godric's Hollow. He wont find us there, I'm sure of it."

"I can give you the gold to buy the house, if you need."

"Thank you, Sirius. We'll check it all out with Dumbledore next time we see him. Would you like something to eat?"

"Thanks, Lil. I'll have a bite."

Lily handed Harry over to James and walked into the kitchen to fix up something for Sirius. She wiped her eyes on the back of her hand as she got down a plate. 'Stop it,' she told herself. 'Crying isn't going to fix anything.'

James walked Harry around the room while he sucked away at the bottle. Harry's tiny hands could barely hold the bottle up. He eventually became tired and let the bottle drop.

"Done, eh?"

Harry belched in reply. He then snuggled into James' chest, listening to his father's heartbeat. James gently patted his son's back and Harry drifted off to sleep on James' shoulder.

"Why would Voldemort want to kill him?" James asked aloud.

"Voldemort is mad. All he wants is power. All he loves is himself. I doubt he can love anything that isn't legless and slithering along the ground," said Sirius contemptuously.

"Here you go," said Lily as she gave the plate to Sirius.

He smelled it in a very doglike way.

"What is this?"

"You have never had grilled cheese either?"

"Never had what?"

"Eat it, Padfoot. It's good."

A/N: ok ok I know the title doesn't make sense yet but it will in following chapters. I'm only going to write more though if people like it. So review and LET ME KNOW! Thankies!


	2. Happy Birthday

A/N: I really hope this fic turns out well. But I can only know if you review for me. thankies! Oh and also, I don't know why the rating says R cuz I really meant it to be PG-13. ;; I'll have to fix that. Well stop listening to me and read! Geez....

Disclaimer: you people should know I don't own Harry Potter! But there are some weird people out there who'll jump at the chance for a lawsuit. So just to be safe (seeing as I didn't put a disclaimer up in the last chapter ;;) I don't own Harry Potter. HA! Now you people cant sue me! I can rest easy. Kk. Chapter two!!!

"Happy Birthday, Harry!" chorused Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, Prongs, and Lily.

Harry clapped and stared at the candle on his Black Forest birthday cake. Sirius leaned over and blew it out for him. Everyone clapped.

"All right, boys, go sit down and I'll hand out the cake and ice cream."

Everyone scrambled for a chair except Remus who offered to help Lily.

"Thanks, Remus." Lily cut Harry a small sliver and Remus set it down on the table.

Harry licked it cautiously before digging in with both hands. They laughed and Lily took several pictures, which she planned to add to her scrapbook.

After dessert, they all gathered around in the hearth room and handed Harry his presents one by one.

Peter, or Wormtail as his friends called him, excused himself early from the party. Harry and the others waved good-bye as Peter ran down the path in the summer night.

"Does Peter seem a bit skittish to you?" Lily asked James.

"Everyone's skittish these days, Lil. I wouldn't worry about him."

She smiled. "You're right, James. Come on, Harry! Let's go play!"

They ran back inside.

Harry walked unsteadily over to Sirius who had transformed on the hearthrug. He panted happily and batted Harry with one large black paw. The two of them eventually fell asleep, Harry holding onto his godfather's black fur.

Lily and James sat together on the couch while Remus unwrapped all of Harry's presents with a few flicks of his wand and proceeded to clean up the rest of they party refuse.

"I'll take care of it, Moony," James said to his friend. "It's getting late and it's not safe to wander around alone after dark."

"You're right." Remus yawned. "I'm tired anyway. See you guys as soon as I can."

"Good-bye, Remus!"

"See ya, Moony!"

Harry lifted his head for a moment and saw Remus grab his cloak.

"Buh bi," he said waving before lying his head back down on Sirius' furry flank.

"See you, Harry. Happy Birthday."

The door closed shut behind him and Sirius started. He transformed back.

"Moony leave, Prongs?"

"Yeah."

Sirius yawned and batted away Harry's hands, which had begun to probe through his hair.

"Cut it out, kiddo. Hey, Lily, you mind if I crash here tonight?"

"Not at all, Sirius. I'll bring you down a pillow and some blankets."

"James, would you mind changing Harry, putting him into pajamas, and putting him to bed?"

"Sure. C'mere, Harry,"

Harry yawned. James took him up and half an hour later, the baby was asleep.

James descended back downstairs. Seeing everything in order, he went back up and into the room he and Lily shared.

Lily was already in bed, her deep red hair flowing over the pillow. Her breathing was not completely even and James knew she was awake. She rolled over and smiled at her husband.

"Get in the bed, Potter," she said smiling.

"Don't make me hex you, Evans," said James returning the grin, meanwhile unbuttoning his shirt.

A/N: ok I personally DID NOT like this chapter very much. If it turned you off and made you not wanna read the rest, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do not give up on me! I promise it will be better, so bear with me. I did think Sirius and Harry were cute tho. - oh well, anyway, REVIEW!


	3. Making Plans

A/N: thanks to all my reviewers! Glad you like the story RedneckVampyro! Anyways, sorry I didn't mention everyone that reviewed. Hope I get a lot more reviews! Anyways, read on and DO NOT forget to review!!!

James sat on the couch in the Potter's living room. Two letters lay open on the coffee table in front of him. He ran a hand through his already untidy hair, making it stand up even more. James let out a long sigh.

"Who wrote?" Lily asked joining her husband on the couch with a cup of tea.

"Sirius and Dumbledore."

"And---?"

"Voldemort killed two more wizarding families that were under the protection of the Order. Lily, we have to find the spy or he'll find us."

"What did Sirius have to say?" Lily asked tensely.

"Same thing basically. That and our house is ready. We'll have to move soon."

Lily glanced around the room. Most of their possessions had already been boxed and levitated upstairs. She sighed. Lily loved their small home. She had put her heart into it and absolutely did not want to leave. But if they didn't…Lily didn't want to think about it. Those thoughts already haunted her nightmares.

She took one more sip from her tea before setting it down on the table on a coaster.

"Lily, I know you don't want to leave…"

"No, James. It's all right. I want us to be happy and safe." She smiled and her emerald green eyes brightened. "So long as we're safe I don't care where we are."

"There's something else we need to talk about. Dumbledore says we'll need a Secret Keeper."

"We're using the Fidelus Charm?"

"Yeah."

"I suppose you'll use Sirius?" Lily asked automatically.

"Who else would I use?" James said with a bit of a laugh. Lily kissed James on the cheek and went upstairs to check on Harry in his crib.

"So you'll do it, Padfoot?" James asked his best friend.

"I don't mind at all, Prongs! But…."

"But what?"

"What if we—did a bluff? Used someone Voldemort wouldn't expect."

"I'd rather you do it," James said with a smile. "I don't trust anyone else as much as you. Not even Remus."

"How about Peter? He's the weakest in the Order and Voldemort wouldn't expect us to use him. Especially after Dumbledore offered to do the honors himself."

"Dumbledore?" both Lily and James exclaimed.

"Yeah. He sent the owl this morning. I guess it arrived after you left. Anyway," Sirius waved his hand dismissing the matter. "I think it's brilliant to use Peter. He's never stood up for himself. He's weak and doesn't look like a threat. No one will suspect him!"

"The only thing that worries me," Lily interrupted. "Is that Peter doesn't stand up for himself. If Voldemort DOES come after Peter, will Peter stand up for us?"

"Lily," chided James. "The Marauders always look out for each other. Peter wont sell us to Voldemort."

Lily adjusted Harry on her hip with a sigh. She had never really liked Peter. He didn't stand up for himself and she had never seen him stand up for Remus, Sirius, or James. She wanted Sirius to be the Secret Keeper. But she didn't want to offend Sirius or James by insulting Peter and didn't say a word.

"All right," she agreed in a whisper.

"Good. We'll have to find Peter first though. He's been in hiding ever since the murders a couple of weeks ago. And it's hard to find a rat," winked Sirius handsomely.

James slapped Sirius on the back.

"You know we can never thank you enough," James said uncharacteristically serious.

"Just keep bringing Harry by to see me and that's thanks enough."

Harry looked up at the sound of his name. He smiled at his godfather and reached for him. Sirius tussled Harry's tuft of untidy hair.

"Sorry, kiddo. I think you're going home now."

"Yes, we'd best be going," Lily, said kissing Harry's forehead as he began to whimper. "Tell Sirius goodbye!"

Lower lip stuck out, Harry miserably waved to Sirius.

"Hey tell you guys what: you two apparate home and I'll give Harry a ride."

"Don't drop my kid, Mate," James said smiling. Lily wasn't as lenient.

"You'd better not Sirius Black! I'll be waiting for you when you get home and if there is ANYTHING wrong with my baby---"

Sirius sweat dropped and took Harry in his arms.

"Don't worry, Lils. I got him."

"Bye!"

The two parents disappeared with a loud CRACK!

"Come on, Harry," Sirius grinned mischievously. "Get on the motorcycle."

Harry laughed in anticipation.

_A/N: kind of a short chappie, but it was an important one. I think I could have written it better, but I wanted to update! So there. Anyways, REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!!! _


	4. Contemplations

A/N: ok ok here's chappie two and a GINORMOUS thanks to everyone who has taken the time to review!!

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter ok! Stop rubbing it in! if you think I own Harry Potter, you gotta be clueless, I mean, J.K. Rowlings name is on EVERY HP BOOK!!! Ug now I am mad at you! Read and review and make me feel better.

Lily and James drove down Godric's Hollow in an enchanted car so that all of their belongings fit inside. Harry was jumping up and down on the seat with a wide grin on his face. He eventually became bored with jumping and began to pull his father's hair.

"OUCH! DAMMIT!" shouted James.

Harry found it tremendously funny and began to laugh. Lily scooped him up though and held him on her lap. Harry set his small face in the fiercest glare he could.

"Let Daddy drive, Harry," she scolded ever so gently.

The car ride was over in a minute or two anyway, and the small family piled out.

Lily looked up at the home they were suppose to be living in. it wasn't nearly as big as their other home, windows were broken, it needed a new coat of paint, and it was impossible to see inside for all the grime on the windows.

James could see how unhappy his wife was. He put his arm around her and kissed her neck.

"We'll make it work, Lils! I promise. It'll be the most beautiful house in the world when we're done with it."

Lily managed a smile. "Of course! I'll set up Harry's playpen and we can begin unloading."

Harry watched curiously with large green eyes as his toys, clothes, and bed were moved into this strange home. At first, it was all exciting, but eventually, Harry became confused and frustrated. He began to cry for his parents and James came over to his small son and scooped him up. Harry's tears ceased.

"Hey, kiddo, we have a huge backyard. I'll have you out there on a broom as soon as I can manage it! But don't tell Mommy," he winked.

Harry perked up at the word 'broom'. He liked Daddy's broom. Flying was fun! Maybe this whole confusing mess wasn't so bad after all….

Lily and James sat on their own couch that evening, legs intertwined. Harry played contentedly with his birthday gifts on the floor.

"I think we might just be all right, James. I mean, we can make it out here by ourselves."

"Yeah…" James' thoughts seemed to be elsewhere. "Lily…?" he voiced a moment later.

"What is it?"

"Did we make the right choice? Choosing Peter? I mean, _Dumbledore _offered to do it."

"It's a little late to be thinking about it," pointed out Lily.

"Yeah I know but…" James ran a hand through his hair. "I was holding our lives in my hands. I want to know if I made the right choice."

Lily snuggled closer to James and rested her red head on his chest. She breathed in his scent and felt a calm wash over her. James began playing with her soft silky hair, twirling it around his fingers.

"James, if I die, I don't want to go without you," Lily said. James could hear the tears in her voice.

"Lily…!"

"I mean it! I'm afraid to die, James! But if I died with you, maybe it wouldn't be…so bad…. but then I think about Harry. What if he doesn't live either? He's only a baby! Would Voldemort be that heartless?!"

James narrowed his beautiful hazel eyes. Something shone fiercely in them that made Lily afraid of her husband for a moment.

"We wont let that bastard kill our son," he growled. "I refuse to let him. I'll die before that happens. I am going to teach my son to ride a broom. He is going to be a star Quidditch player. He is going to get excellent grades in school. He is going to become an Auror. And then one day, he will kill Voldemort. My son WILL LIVE."

Lily let a tear spill over her face.

"I know you wont let him. I know you'll die for us," she cried. "But why should we have to die?"

"The Longbottoms are doing the same thing. Think about it; they live in the very same fear we do."

"He can have the Longbottom's son, but not mine!" Lily began shaking. "I've never realized how great the danger was until today I think. When we had to relocate so that son of a bitch couldn't find us and kill us. I think it finally hit me today, James, and it hurt!"

She cried harder into James' chest and all he could do was stroke her comfortingly. He himself didn't know what to do. He was entrusted with the lives of the woman he loved and their only child. He could never forgive himself if he was wrong. Never.

Harry began to be affected by his sobbing mother. He looked around helplessly, waiting for someone to come pick him up maybe. Even his father appeared to be fighting tears. Harry wanted to cry for someone to hold him, but he somehow couldn't. He crawled over to his mother and pulled himself up on her knees. Lily put him on her lap.

Still confused and not knowing quite what to do, Harry hugged his mother and kissed her tear-stained face.

Lily looked at Harry beaming.

"Thank you, Harry," she said giving him a kiss in return. "You want to sleep with Mommy and Daddy tonight?"

Knowing what you want and not knowing how to tell someone you want it is a very difficult thing. So Harry gave the best affirmation he could.

"All right then, everyone. Let's head on upstairs to sleep."

A/N: I found this chapter very fun to write! It was so sad!!! And then there was little harry trying to make his mommy feel better…TT I wanted to give him a hug! Anyway, ya'll know the drill. REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW AND THEN TELL YOUR FRIENDS TO REVIEW!!! Get it? Got it? Good.


	5. Decision

A/N: all right people, my goal is to get at least fifty reviews on this story so if you could help my quota, I'd appreciate it a lot! Thanks and I love all my reviewers! Okokok,

On another note, I just want to point out that the Fidelus Charm has not been performed yet because in tSS, hagrid says, not a week after the charm was performed or something. So they've probably just presented Peter with the idea. However they haven't told anyone exactly where they are, just to be on the safe side. That being said, read and review!

Chapter 5….

"The curtains look great, Lil!" praised James.

James' face was paint splattered along with his clothes. Around his arm was a bucket full of paintbrushes and in his hand, he held a bucket of white paint.

Lily had just finished putting up the curtains in their tiny kitchen.

"Thanks, James. Are you done outside?"

"Yeah, finally. I don't see how muggles do it without magic! I'm going to have sore arms for weeks!" James cursed.

"No you wont. Because then we're going to paint the inside," Lily smiled somewhat evilly.

"Aw come on, Lily! I'm tired!"

"We're not doing the inside for a couple of days. I have to go buy the paint and then we have to decide which rooms we're doing which color. So it'll take a couple of days."

James breathed a sigh of relief. He had been almost positive Lily was going to make him paint something else before the day was over. He threw the paintbrushes in the sink and headed upstairs to shower the paint out of untidy black hair.

"Check on Harry, while you're up, ok?" Lily called up the stairs. "He's in his crib taking a nap, but I think he's awake by now."

"Alright."

Improvements on the tiny house made a wonderful difference. Through Lily's perseverance and James' obedience, the house was good as new by the first few weeks of September. The air caught a chill and leaves began to tint orange and red. No word from the wizarding world was carried to the couple except the word Peter could bring them on his very infrequent visits.

Peter came to see them only twice. Each time he was nervous and jumpy. Lily and James wondered what the idea of being Secret Keeper for them was doing to him.

"James, I don't know if we can force Peter to hide us," Lily gently told her husband after Peter's second visit. "It's taking a toll on him. He's sick James!"

"I know."

"I don't want to hurt anyone in order to keep us safe. What if this kills Peter?"

"Please, Lily…"

"Maybe I'm worrying too much. I don't know…."

"Lily"

"Yes?"

"Peter vowed to give his life for ours. I don't want to think that he'll actually die because of that vow. I've been a friend with Peter for many years. For one of us to kill each other…it would be unforgivable. The Marauders will always be undivided!" James added smiling. "Please don't worry about Peter. I know Peter would say something if we were really hurting him. He doesn't exactly have high pain tolerance."

"You know him better than I," Lily shrugged.

"Now, woman," James said still smiling. "Go cook the meal!"

Lily shoved him but all the same walked into the kitchen to prepare the meal. She clanged around her pots and pans, and then stopped staring at the walls, which had been painted a gold color.

"I think I wanted this color to be lighter," she called to James. "What do you think?"

James wasn't anywhere to be found.

It was past midnight when James awoke in a cold sweat. Images of his dead wife and son flashed before his eyes. He sat up and held his head in his hands, running his fingers through his jet-black hair. He let himself calm down a bit, but just to be sure, he reached over and rested a hand on Lily's sleeping form. She moved gently up and down with every breath.

James slid out of bed, careful not to wake Lily. He tiptoed down the dark narrow hallway and into Harry's small room.

The curtains Lily had hung only the day before blew in the wind. The night-light cast strange shadows about the room.

When James peeked over the side of Harry's crib, his son was staring right back at him. Harry smiled hoping to be picked up.

"Hey, kiddo, what are you doing up?" whispered James. He reached in and scooped Harry up. He held him close, almost like he was trying to affirm that Harry was still alive. "Only a dream…" James told himself sternly. "We're safe, we're still here, and we're still together."

A particularly strong breeze slammed the shudders against the house. James rushed over and shut the window with a flick of his wand.

The clock above the mantelpiece downstairs chimed one in the morning. James yawned and put Harry back to sleep. Harry cried a bit at being left alone again, but he quickly fell back asleep.

James crawled back into bed, thoughts rushing through his mind so quickly it was almost painful.

_That dream was all too real. But Peter would never…he would never betray us. I know it. He couldn't. He wouldn't have the heart. After all we've done for him I know he couldn't. We've taken care of him nearly his entire life. We are his shields. _

_**Ahh but Peter always liked being taken care of **_said a voice cunningly in James' mind. **_You just said so yourself. Peter likes being taken care of. He'll go to Voldemort. You've suspected him of being the spy all along. You know Sirius would never betray you. His hatred for the Dark Lord is too strong for him to ever give in. But Peter…_**

_I trust Sirius' decision! _James shouted back.

He lay awake for a few hours, battling back and forth with himself. He wanted to believe Peter would never betray them, but in his heart, he knew how weak Peter was and how quickly he would give in to power.

"James you didn't sleep well last night," Lily said her voice full of concern.

James had trotted downstairs around mid morning, his hair messier than usual, his face in need of a shave, and dark circles under his eyes.

"Wha—oh yeah I uh couldn't sleep last night."

He quickly brewed an Awakening Draught and gulped it down.

"I would've awakened you sooner," she said. "But you were fast asleep. Look," she held out a letter in her hand. "I think Peter dropped this by last night. I waited for you to open it."

James took the letter and slid his finger beneath the envelope. He took out the letter and unfolded.

" 'Dear Lily and James and little Harry too,' " James began reading aloud.

'I hope you're all doing well as you read this letter. Things are going well for the Order and we have made several victorious advances against You-know-who. However, we have not been able to find the spy yet. Whoever it is, seems to be feeding information to the Dark Lord. Dumbledore advises us to perform the Fidelus Charm as soon as possible. Unfortunately, I will be out of town until October 25. If it's possible for you, the Charm can be performed then. Stay out of trouble, Padfoot.

Best Wishes,

Wormtail."

"We'll have to lay very low until the 25," Lily shivered adjusting Harry on her hip. "And a few barriers around the house aren't such a bad idea. What do you think, James? James?"

"What? Oh, sorry, Lil, I guess I dozed off. Sure barriers sound like a great idea. Anything to keep us from him," James added pointedly putting emphasis on 'him'.

Lily reached up a soft hand and stroked her husband's face.

"Please stop worrying," she whispered. "Worrying wont help us. Now go back to bed and get some work so we can get to work."

James kissed Lily, patted Harry on the head, ruffling his tufts of black hair. He turned from them and jogged back upstairs. But James didn't go back to sleep. Sleep was impossible right now. He lay in bed just long enough for Lily to believe him to be asleep then dressed.

* * *

A/N: well a sort of erm uneventful chappie but it was an important one b/c it pointed out to ya'll reading it that the charm has NOT been performed yet. yeah that was my mistake i fergot ter fiks. REVIEW! please!


	6. The Fidelius Charm

A/N: last chapter was a wee bit short dontcha think? Well whatever you think, I don't care! Now if you review we can negotiate some conversation terms. Gee I'm rambling aren't I? Nuff o dat. ONWARD READER!

A muggle couple taking their evening walk glanced at the abandoned house on the corner of Godric's Hollow. Vines twined up the sides and over the windowsills, through the cracked and broken windows. The paint was chipped and entirely missing in some areas. All in all, it was dilapidated.

"And it used to be such a lovely house," commented the wife.

"Just goes to show how lazy some people are," snorted her husband.

Lily grinned and let the curtain fall back into place. Her shielding charm had worked! The local muggles hadn't noticed a thing. Well they hadn't noticed that there was someone still living in the house. It was a real shame that they couldn't see it though, thought Lily. After all the hard work she and James had put into it, they ended up having to hide. Oh, ho ho the cruel irony.

James seemed to be thinking along the same lines. He saw what had happened and muttered a few curses, causing the lights to flicker for a moment. Lily sent him a reproachful glance.

"C'mon, James," she said standing behind him, placing her hands on his shoulders. "You're not even going to fire some amazingly sarcastic comment at me? This is quite unlike you."

James gave one of her hands a squeeze and stood up.

"I'm a little uneasy, that's all," he said smiling.

"I know what you mean. I'm so jumpy, thinking you-know-who's going to find us before Peter gets here."

"Say his name, Lil. He wants us to be so afraid of him that we fear to even speak his name. Don't let him get what he wants!" it was a gentle scolding but Lily bit her lip and looked away.

"But I really am that afraid of him, James. I'm so afraid of him that I wake up at night and I don't know why, but then I know it's because I felt his eyes burning into me, watching. I'll be working in the kitchen and shut the windows, as though it'll lock him out forever. Just walking to the restroom I have to look over my shoulder to make sure no one's there."

"I don't know why you're that afraid of him," James interrupted. "After all, you're the scariest person I know. And I mean that in a good way."

She punched him on the arm and walked away, calling over her shoulder that she was going to wake Harry.

"I'm just afraid as you are," James told himself. "But I'm just trying to resist being a coward."

"Oh, Peter thank goodness you've come!" Lily said opening the door and pulling the small man in out of the rain.

Peter's eyes darted about the room as if he were analyzing all possible escape routes. James walked into the room and gave him a hearty thump on the back that nearly broke Peter in half. (a/n: oh how we wish it did…).

"Let's…let's do this…as…as quickly as p-possible," Peter stammered, his rat like nostrils flaring a bit.

Lily and James both nodded simultaneously.

James picked up Harry and took him off to bed, leaving Lily alone with Peter.

"I cant thank you enough," she said after a few moments. "We are deeply in your debt, Peter."

Peter just stood there twitching. A smile crawled across his face briefly.

"Do you want anything to eat? Drink?"

"N-n-n-no…No thank you."

James entered the room.

"He'll cry for awhile but I think he's pretty tired so he'll probably go to sleep pretty quick," James said gesturing towards Harry's room.

"Let's do this," said Lily, putting a reaffirming hand on Peter's shoulder.

---------------------Well I don't know how the fidelus charm is performed or if Rowling has a plan to tell us how it is done so umm bladeedadeeda----fidelus charm----voila---Peter is the secret keeper-------------------------

Lily and James waved their friend off into the wet night. As soon as the door was closed, Lily collapsed onto the floor, crying gently.

"Lily!"

"I'm sorry—I'm fine, James. It's just that…he's so _weak _and we're entrusting him with our lives? I'm so sorry. I do not doubt him. But I'd much rather have Remus or Sirius."

James knelt down and held her, letting her cry a bit.

"Yeah I know how you feel. But I really don't think he'll cave. Really I don't."

He stroked her beautiful red hair, breathing it in. he wouldn't let Lily die. And his son would grow to be a famous Quidditch player. They would all be alive this time next year. Lily might be pregnant again. Harry would be two and waddling around getting into every form of mischief imaginable. Perhaps Voldemort would be dead and they'd have a Halloween party. Sirius and Remus and Peter would all be there and they'd all be happier then they ever had been.

Wouldn't that be nice?

A/N: not a very exciting chapter I know, but an important one! Heh heh the details were a little yes. Anyhooo REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!


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